Insanity
by DrankBleachAsChild
Summary: She used to be his sanity. But she was gone. And now, insanity ruled. IchiRuki drabble.


A/N:

Hello, here I am again with a new oneshot. This is something I have been keeping in my head for a long time, and now it finally broke out. It ended up being a little dark, but I think that´s fine too. Plus, this time, I got the help of a Beta reader, , who really gave me some great advice, so I owe her a lot of thanks. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not and haver never owned even the _hope_ of ever owning Bleach. It´s all Kubo Tite.

* * *

><p>She was gone.<p>

Ichigo was lying on his bed, staring up into the ceiling. The light in the room was turned off, but he didn´t mind. Around him, everything was silent, dead silent, reminding him of the lack of her presence. Ichigo could feel it.

No midget screaming at him. No midget arguing with him. The sound of her small body, as she turned around in bed, accompanying him to sleep, was gone. Everything he usually associated with her was gone.

_She_ was gone.

It had only taken a second, a second where he wasn´t paying attention. He had been too caught up in the victory over Aizen. As he stood there, staring at seal that had engulfed the former shinigami, he was too lost in his musings to notice the arrancar creeping up behind her, to notice the shining blade closing in on her heart. When he finally saw it, it was too late. He yelled at her, screaming at her to get away.

But it was too late. The arrancar was too close for her to react. She never even saw it coming. The arrancar pierced her, killing her the moment the blade entered her heart. Her eyes, usually a burning, livid violet, turned cold and lifeless in a moment. Her body was limp in his arms as he caught her in her fall. He shook her frame, yelled, screamed at her to wake up, to talk to him, but it was useless. Nothing happened. And then, Ichigo realized.

She was gone, and nothing could bring her back. Not Inoue, not Unohana. There was nothing he could do to save her. She was gone forever, and it was all his fault.

Something inside him broke. He felt strangely apathetic. Nothing mattered anymore. The world turned to a blur before his eyes. He didn´t care when they killed the arrancar responsible, nor when someone gently took her body out of his arms and carried her away. At her funeral, he didn´t shed a single tear. It was only when he came home, to the solitary of his room that he let out his emotions. Tearing his room apart in rage, cursing the world for taking her away from him.

As he broke everything he could find, he realized that he had loved her; that, at some point, his feelings for her had changed. She was the one who was always by his side, no matter what. Even as he had thrown himself into yet another battle, she was always there, watching over him. She was the one who held him at night when he woke up from yet another nightmare. She was the one who kept the monster in him at bay.

She used to be his sanity. And now she was gone.

Ichigo could feel it. The monster in him was finally loose. With Rukia gone, the ties that bound him had been cut. And, as the hollow rummaged through his soul, wreaking havoc as he went, Ichigo found that he couldn´t care less. Zangetsu kept screaming at him, begging him to fight the hollow inside him. Ichigo ignored him, and pretty soon, Zangetsu went quiet. Ichigo didn´t know if he had been taken over by the hollow or if he had given up.

It didn´t matter if Zangetsu was silent, the hollow wasn´t, and as he advanced on him, getting closer and closer to his soul, he spoke to Ichigo, telling him that he was coming for him, that in the end, it had all been a matter of time.

It had been three days now since the defeat of Aizen, three days since Rukia died. Sometimes, his friends came by, trying to talk him into coming out. Sometimes it was his family. But Ichigo ignored them, and just like Zangetsu, the eventually went quiet, leaving him alone with the monster inside him.

And the hollow was gaining on him, so close to taking control of him. His maniacal laughter echoed in Ichigo´s head, his body surging with pain. His inner world was already collapsing inside him, the sound of buildings falling apart mixed with the mad laughter of a monster close to his goal.

Ichigo brought a hand to his face, feeling around. He could already make out fragments of the mask on his face. The pain suddenly intensified and he fell of the bed, clutching his stomach. He staggered to the door, grabbing for anything to make the pain inside him stop. But it was too late. The mask enveloped his face. His finger sharpened to claws, his whole body consumed by white, hardened skin.

Distantly, Ichigo could hear someone pounding on his door, yelling his name. But he didn´t listen. Finally, the pain inside him was gone, consumed by insanity.

Ichigo laughed. And it was the mad laugh of monster.

She used to be his sanity.

But now she was gone.

And a hollow laugh echoed in the night.

* * *

><p>The end. If you liked it or have constructive criticism, please leave a review, ´cause it makes my day when you do!<p> 


End file.
